Happy Anniversary
Today is our 46th wedding anniversary. Five years ago today on our anniversary our lives were changed when we received the news that Ken had cancer. It's funny how vivid memories are when they are associated with strong feeling or emotion. It's like they imprint. Cancer certainly wasn't ever in my life plan for myself or Ken. I guess it isn't ever in anyones life plan--and that's why it catches us so unaware and in surprising ways and times. Five years ago today I wasn't sure how long we would have together in this life. It's funny how when something derails us from our plans, it's like getting off the wrong exit and having to wind your way without the help of google maps. Looking back I wonder how I've changed, or if I have changed. I know the scenery on the new route was not what I had planned. How would I be different if cancer hadn't changed our course? I guess I'll never know that for sure. I know things I didn't know before and had never planned on learning. I know that I missed seeing some of the sights that I had planned to see on my original route, but maybe the route we took was better than the one I planned. I guess those are things only God knows.
Tonight I am writing from a hotel in Iowa City, Iowa. We left Vermont yesterday, tearfully. But also with a resignation that once again, we've gotten off an unplanned exit because there was a detour called Covid-19. Once again plans are derailed by circumstances beyond my control. I'm trying to be a "half glass full" person and be grateful for the almost 8 months we served as missionaries. It's hard though. I'm disappointed. I would be lying if I said anything else.
But then I can look outward and see the disappointment of others and realize that I have nothing to complain about. Especially when I remember our dear friends, Tracy and Sallee, whose mission was cut short, and whose call to serve as a mission president, was derailed by Cancer. (That's an exit no one intends to take) It pains me to think of their journey this past 3 months.
I can also look outward and see the young missionaries that I have grown to love so much, being released early because they were unlucky enough to have some health issue. Elder Ellsworth, Elder Jensen, and Elder Sessions (who I have adopted as my 25th grandchild). Elder Sessions has only been out 2 months and really lit on fire as a missionary.
I can also look outward at all the people right now who are out of work because of the covid-19 pandemic and wondering how to make their car payment, or house payment and how to even buy food.
So, despite the disappointment of not being able to continue to serve a mission, I will go forward with faith in Jesus Christ and trust in God. He has never failed me and He won't fail me now. I am grateful for a living prophet more now that I have ever been. I plan to keep my eye on the prophet in these days of chaos.
We are both SO GRATEFUL that we had this time to serve. Five years ago we thought a mission was off the table. The love I have felt these past 8 months has been so powerful. Is that what all my children felt on their missions? That powerful love? The Love of God? I have felt His love for me--but more importantly I have felt His love for them--those that we served. I understand more why Laura was in denial about her mission coming to a close, and why Shelly couldn't quit crying leaving Latvia. I'm sure my boys felt that love also, but they weren't openly tearful (boys will be boys).
Missionary work is a labor of love. I get it now. I'm worried about losing that feeling--about forgetting. If anyone who reads this can tell me how not to lose this feeling, I would really appreciate it. ♥️
Tonight I am writing from a hotel in Iowa City, Iowa. We left Vermont yesterday, tearfully. But also with a resignation that once again, we've gotten off an unplanned exit because there was a detour called Covid-19. Once again plans are derailed by circumstances beyond my control. I'm trying to be a "half glass full" person and be grateful for the almost 8 months we served as missionaries. It's hard though. I'm disappointed. I would be lying if I said anything else.
But then I can look outward and see the disappointment of others and realize that I have nothing to complain about. Especially when I remember our dear friends, Tracy and Sallee, whose mission was cut short, and whose call to serve as a mission president, was derailed by Cancer. (That's an exit no one intends to take) It pains me to think of their journey this past 3 months.
I can also look outward and see the young missionaries that I have grown to love so much, being released early because they were unlucky enough to have some health issue. Elder Ellsworth, Elder Jensen, and Elder Sessions (who I have adopted as my 25th grandchild). Elder Sessions has only been out 2 months and really lit on fire as a missionary.
I can also look outward at all the people right now who are out of work because of the covid-19 pandemic and wondering how to make their car payment, or house payment and how to even buy food.
So, despite the disappointment of not being able to continue to serve a mission, I will go forward with faith in Jesus Christ and trust in God. He has never failed me and He won't fail me now. I am grateful for a living prophet more now that I have ever been. I plan to keep my eye on the prophet in these days of chaos.
We are both SO GRATEFUL that we had this time to serve. Five years ago we thought a mission was off the table. The love I have felt these past 8 months has been so powerful. Is that what all my children felt on their missions? That powerful love? The Love of God? I have felt His love for me--but more importantly I have felt His love for them--those that we served. I understand more why Laura was in denial about her mission coming to a close, and why Shelly couldn't quit crying leaving Latvia. I'm sure my boys felt that love also, but they weren't openly tearful (boys will be boys).
Missionary work is a labor of love. I get it now. I'm worried about losing that feeling--about forgetting. If anyone who reads this can tell me how not to lose this feeling, I would really appreciate it. ♥️
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| Front: Sister Ensign, Sister Roundy, Sister Josse, Sister Young, Me Back: Elder Swenson, Elder Sessions, Elder Huffines, Elder Jensen, Elder Pace, Elder Plowman, Elder Crum |
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| Our baptism (the one we weren't allowed to attend because of "corona" L to R: Hope's Friend (I don't know her name), Hope (who was baptized and who I adore), Elder Jensen and Elder Crum (who I also adore😁)
Here are some things that I will miss about Vermont:
1. The amazing tap water!
2. The mapling (We really did actually miss that cause its happening now)
3. The people of Vermont.
4. The trees of Vermont.
5. The winding roads of Vermont
6. The beauty of Vermont
7. My cozy apartment (all on one level)
8. The wildlife out my back window
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And here is something that I'm excited to come home for:
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